Seeking Attention Seekers

Attention seeking isn’t just for the narcissists. As a middle class, indulged, female I’ve been taught two conditioned truths;

 (1). Without an audience, my worth can not be confirmed. [Correct Answer. Gold Star!]

(2). Seeking attention is a negative. [That bitch is thirssstty]

If you disagree, let’s breakdown how society works. First you are born. If your family doesn’t like you, you die. Then you grow a little older. If your peers don’t like you, you get out casted.  If you’re out casted you won’t make important social connections for jobs, education, marriage, and community. If you don’t get an education or a job, you’ll have no money. If you have no means to support yourself, you’re more likely to…die. [At least that’s the theory that’s indoctrinated into our minds from the time we enter civilized society]. Hence our inner survivalist screaming there’s safety in numbers!!

As I write, my puppy sits next to me and stares. She makes small grunting sounds, and occasionally lifts her paw, attempting her most endearing head tilts. She does this for attention. As a baby crying upon entering this Earth confirms, the need for attention and approval is innate.

Here’s the great news.We’ve entered an era of SOCIAL MEDIA. Social Media:The ultimate tool in the attention seekers utility belt. Twitter, Facebook, Myspace, Blogger, Instagram, Pinterest, Foursquare, and Google Plus are at my disposal 24 hours a day from my cell phone. So in theory we should all be connected and happy.

Yet…  (2). Seeking attention is a negative. [That bitch is thirssstty]

Where’s the boundary? Sayings like, “Don’t beg for facebook likes. Work hard to earn what you deserve.” Have gone viral [whilst hypocritically collecting thousands of facebook-likes]. Why are the “attention whores” seen in such a negative light and not worshiped?

The answer is in the balance and integrity. Americans are traditional folks. We like the humble-billionare; the hardworking business owner who still sweeps his own store floors; the cowboy who kills but only the bad guys who deserve it. We expect people to be well rounded. We like to make people work for approval.

We also are lead by fear. People see the self absorbed as selfish. If we focus on bringing the attention inward, then we lose focus on becoming generativist. If we are not contributing to others, we don’t deserve their support.

The point: find balance. My social media lovers- if you want to utilize these forums by my side, please be ready to contribute. Discuss, debate, support, create laughter, show love, share knowledge. Do not let jealousy, prejudice, or insecurities jade the opportunity we have to use forums for GOOD. Collaboration can lead to beautiful things. Celebrate yourself! But remember to celebrate others.